November 2003 (v6 i3)
Doubting the moon landing since 1997
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All-cheese pizza makes the �grate� with customers
by Kristin Hillery, Advertising Director

ANN ARBOR, MI — Domino�s Pizza revealed their latest creation at a press conference last Monday. Defying modern pizza-making ideology, the Severe Cheese Pizza has only cheese in its recipe. So far, customers and food critics alike have been saying �cheese� to the new pie.

The Severe Cheese Pizza excludes two of the three traditional elements of a pizza�dough and sauce�and is made with an outer �intense� layer of mozzarella cheese with an inner �severe� layer of the customer�s choice of parmesan, American, brie, Swiss, or cottage cheese. Domino�s customers can order Severe Cheese Cheese Sticks to go along with their pizza for an additional $3.99.

The pizza was developed when Domino�s realized that a new product was necessary to keep up with America�s growing demand for high-calorie foods as well as competition from rival Pizza Hut�s Stuffed Crust Gold Pizza�appropriately named for the golden cheddar cheese ring that both tops and fills the crust. Since its unveiling, the Severe Cheese Pizza has accrued �cheddar� for leaders in the pizza industry, setting a new standard for the business.

Still, some critics warn that the current industry trend of over-marketed, high-fat foods may be short-lived if �people come to their senses about what they eat,� says fitness expert Dan Perry. �Americans are getting fatter every year. It�s not okay, so we need to ma�oh, goodness. Did I really say that? �Okay, so?� �Oh, queso?�� laughed Perry. �That�s just plain cheesy!�

Whether or not Domino�s plans to make the Severe Cheese Pizza a permanent feature on their menu will depend on how well it sells.

�It would really stink if they cut the cheese,� said Lou Palou, a loyal Domino�s customer who feels the unique new pizza deserves a grade �A.� �They finally realized that all that bread and sauce were taking away from the best part. I love this pizza and it�s all I want to eat now�it�s just that darned gouda.�

Domino�s encourages everyone to give their new pizza a try, and they are confident that it will be successful.

�This isn�t just the same �mold� thing,� explained Domino�s CEO Walter Fromage. �The Extreme Cheese Pizza is by far the �dairy� best product we�ve marketed in our forty-three-year history.�
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