Recently, the Washington Legislature proposed a tax on coffee in order to raise money for schools. That proposal failed, but these may not:
Galveston, TX — The Suck Tax.
In order to quantify suck, the following criteria will be used: number of shark-tooth necklaces owned, the volume of one’s beer gut, and years of residency. Revenue will be used in efforts to catapult the city into Corpus Christi’s tier of coolness.
Annapolis, MD — The Seamen Tax.
The city plans to boost liquid cash flow by taxing the stream of seamen coming from the nearby naval base.
South Beach, FL — The Flamboyant, Scantily Clad Rollerblading Tax.
Glistening, waxed bodies zipping along boardwalks, will be taxed for the following items: walkmans, fanny packs, wrap-around sunglasses, hi-fives, and lycraspandex.
Cincinnati, OH — The Big Fat Pussy Tax.
Everyone will be taxed, and they all know why.