October 2003 (v6 i2)
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NouveauCabulary
bringing you the latest in hip verbiage

R. Kelly (v): to use something as a bathroom (e.g., "Hold on a sec, guys, I gotta go R. Kelly the side of my garage," "When you die, I'm gonna R. Kelly your grave, you son of a bitch," "Awww shit! Somebody just R. Kelly'd my car!")

cootertease (n): 1. religious, attractive male saving himself for marriage or the priesthood; 2. scantily clad or provacatively dressed attractive male jogger who is gay, married, otherwise unavailable

academic advising office (n): 1. a false hope for salvation; 2. a waste of time

Roy (v): to get owned, a la Williams in the '02 OU game or Horn in recent tiger incident (e.g., "Dude, I beat you by 1,400 points--you just got ROYED!")

Ashcroft (v): to violate one's personal space (e.g., "Ugh, this creepy guy on the bus totally tried to Ashcroft me.")

camel ho (n): a slutty girl with a camel toe (e.g.,"That camel ho needs to do some front-side pickin'.")

Daily Texan comic (adj): desperation, a last resort (e.g., "Bush is making a Daily Texan Comic effort to bring the economy out of a coma before elections come around.")

UGL (v): to hang out with friends and converse loudly and needlessly (e.g., "After the concert, let's UGL at Mike's apartment and eat Wendy's.")

roadhead (n): a fanatic of the highway systems (e.g., "Dave is known for his jaw-dropping roadhead expertise.")

chocolate chip ice cream (adj): better than nailing the Olsen Twins (e.g., "This vanilla ice cream is totally chocolate chip ice cream.")

tuition increase (v): to have to eat Ramen noodles after every meal (e.g., "Dude, this tuition increase is giving me the runs.")

hot crotch (n): the feeling of overwhelming desire in the genital region (e.g., "Uncle Jesse's long distance ads give me total hot crotch.")

staple (v): to amorously and irretractably obsess over (e.g., "At first I really liked it when she stapled my balls, but it got weird when she started doing it in public.")

perfect attendance (v): to touch oneself in public (e.g., "Johnny's perfect attendance in English class earned him two gold stars from his penis.")

home run (n): a woman who talks back (e.g., "Bryan likes to play baseball and he hit two home runs yesterday.)

permanent marker (v): to shake a baby repeatedly to make it stop crying

wallet (n): virginity (e.g., "I lost my wallet last night playing leapfrog with some frat guys.)
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