April/May 2005 (v7 i6)
Fun and Games Until Somone Gets Hurt Since 1997
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Travesty Index
Number of days of summer vacation : 117

Number of swimsuits that make me look fat : 124

Amount of minutes in a year : 525,600

Percent of readers who knew that because they have seen Rent : 78

Internships applied for : 27

Internships that called back to interview : 2

Internships offered : 0

Number of sweet koozies scored at the internship fair : 32

Hours spent sunbathing per day : 3

Hours spent peeling off layers of dead skin : 12

ACC classes you hope to get an easy A in this summer : 3

Number of ACC classes you will get an A in : 3

Total hours of television you will watch over summer : 167

Hours of programming you will actually see : 4

Number of books you plan to read over summer : 22

Number of books you will read : 3, if magazines count

High school friends you plan to hang out with while at home : 7

Number of times you will blow each other off : 9

Number of Texas high-schoolers who will pass out from the heat during marching band practice : 17

Percent of those students who were heavy-set asthmatics : 35

Number of middle school students who will get their first second-hand drug experience at a Dave Matthews Band concert : 77

Amount spent on a Mother's Day gift : $40 and a handmade card

Amount spent on a Father's Day gift : the change you got back when you bought a pack of cigarettes with a $5 bill
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