November 2004 (v7 i3)
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Buy a sword and fall on it because there is nothing left to live for

FROM: Daily Texan Office, 2500 Whitis, Austin, TX
TO: The Iron Works, 2652 Oak Spring Drive, Austin, TX

1. Start out going NORTH on WHITIS toward W 25TH ST.
2. Turn RIGHT onto W 26TH ST/W DEAN KEETON ST.
3. W DEAN KEETON ST becomes MANOR RD.
4. Turn RIGHT onto AIRPORT BLVD/TX-111 LOOP S.
5. Turn RIGHT onto OAK SPRINGS DR.

Head to the mountains because the polar ice caps will melt with Bush in office

FROM: Daily Texan Office, 2500 Whitis, Austin, TX
TO: Guadalupe Mountains National Park, Salt Flat, TX

1. Start out going NORTH on WHITIS toward W 25TH ST.
2. Turn RIGHT onto W 26TH ST/W DEAN KEETON ST.
3. Take the ramp toward I-35 S.
4. Turn SLIGHT RIGHT onto I-35 N.
5. Merge onto I-35 S/US-81 S via the ramp on the LEFT.
6. Take the ANDERSON LOOP exit- EXIT 172.
7. Merge onto TX-1604 LOOP W.
8. Merge onto I-10 W toward EL PASO.
9. Merge onto I-10 W via EXIT 257 toward US-285
10. Turn RIGHT onto US-285.
11. Turn LEFT onto FM 652.
12. Turn LEFT onto UNIVERSITY RD.


Alienate your readers
  1. As the student voice of one of the largest universities in the country, assume an overtly biased stance on a presidential election.
  2. Avoid professionalism. It's boring and doesn't make for an enjoyable read.
  3. Use patently passive-aggressive techniques to express your disappointment in government affairs.
  4. If things don't go your way, compain.


Mourn the death of democracy

FROM: Daily Texan Office, 2500 Whitis, Austin, TX
TO: Oakwood Cemetery, 1601 Navasota, Austin, TX

1. Start out going NORTH on WHITIS toward W 25TH ST.
2. Turn RIGHT onto W 26TH ST/W DEAN KEETON ST.
3. W DEAN KEETON ST becomes MANOR RD.
4. Turn RIGHT onto AIRPORT BLVD
5. Turn RIGHT onto OAK SPRINGS DR.
Back to the November 2004 issue
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